Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
Randomize
