Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
Randomize
