I want to have your abortion
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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