I hate your face
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
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