Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
