This phone does not accept mass texts. Try again.
Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
Randomize
