I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
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