i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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