I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
