Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
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