I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
