saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
Randomize
