oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Randomize
