My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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