They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
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