so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
I want to fling myself into the sun
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
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