I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
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