Went to the doctors. She saw my " I love beer" tattoo. All she said was " My drunken tat is of just one word. "Cornnuts.". Then said Mexico was "awesome." And sent me on my way. Yeah. She's my favorite doctor.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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