I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
