Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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