We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Randomize