Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
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it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
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