You don't have asthma, your pregnant
Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Well I just put wine in my tea
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Randomize
