make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
I lost the right to judge tonight
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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