id be glad to
Apparently last night I sat at the bar with an upside down sharpie lightning bolt on my forehead, yelling "It's Harry Potter's birthday! Let me be on the qudditch team!" And I kept calling the bartender Dobby. There are videos.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Randomize
