How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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