dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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