why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize
