If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
Randomize
