i just wanna soil my oats bro
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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