brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Randomize
