The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
Randomize
