I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Randomize
