i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Help. Why am I so naked?
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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