I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Randomize
