He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Randomize
