How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Randomize
