Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Randomize
