Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
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