I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
Randomize
