At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
