Already got asked if we're dating
Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
This martini tastes like the bartender stirred it with his foreskin.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
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