I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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