I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
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