I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Randomize
