I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Randomize
