At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
Randomize
