I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Randomize
