I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Randomize
