I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
